It’s been a year since my last blog post. I’m still alive, and I’ll give you a life update soon. I came back to blog and realized I had this draft from last year in September that I never posted. So here it is:
Single?
Me too.
But, honestly by choice. And, I refuse to settle for less than I deserve.
I meet guys and it never fails, they all ask “how are you still single?”. Sarcastic me always pops off something like, “I’m crazy, duh”. But, the fact of the matter is I’m not crazy, I just have standards. Which I’ve found is hard to come by in our society. Most people find that it’s easier to find someone online, meet them once or twice, and hook up with them and then move on to the next one. We’ve all been forced to live in this hook up culture, whether we like it or not. Most of us have experienced this at some point. How the hell did we even get here? Excuse me, please give me directions elsewhere.
It’s really difficult to weed out the bad guys, while still trying to give the good guys a chance (vice versa for girls, this isn’t a man hating post). It really is difficult to figure out the intentions of another person when most of my generation is awful at communicating. I know that along the way I’ve missed out on some awesome guys because I saw potential in some loser who had me all sorts of jaded. I’m sorry if you’re one of those nice guys that I’ve dismissed in the past. I’m also apologizing to myself for giving those losers the time of day.
Why do we choose to live in electronic relationships? When did we decide that texting your significant other 24/7 is okay? I’m old school. Pick up the phone and call me. Sure, I still text because it’s convenient. But, to all of you dudes/girls who think you can just get to know someone over texting, get the hell out. You don’t want a relationship; you want a pen pal who is conveniently there at your disposal. We’ve all been there. We all want attention. I know so many people my age who truly just do not know how to interact with people in person and it honestly freaks me out. People can pretend to be whoever they want online and through texting. But, who are they really?
I’m a bit of an old soul. I still believe in going on dates. I believe in doing nice things for people without expecting them to do something in return. I seek men who still carry chivalrous traits. Open the door for me, and I promise I will always say thank you. If you do something nice for me, it never goes unnoticed. I’m not really one of those girls who expects flowers, but I will always appreciate it. I’d prefer a nice note left for me when I don’t expect it. Pump my gas for me when it’s late at night (my Dad will tell you that you should always do that). Call me on your way home just to talk about each others days. You don’t have to work hard to make me happy. Respect me, and I will do the same. Just pay attention, be kind, make me laugh, and be thoughtful. Is that really too much to ask for? If it is, stay away from me.
Let’s talk about what makes dating so damn difficult:
Technology.
Everyone knows I don’t post about relationships on social media. I just don’t. I don’t desire to have everyone in my business. A previous ex and I got into a huge argument about me not posting about him on social media. I felt it was unnecessary. I will occasionally, but it’s just not my thing. Maybe my feelings toward that will change once I meet the right person. He felt like I was hiding him and being sketchy. But, from my perspective he had met several of my friends and whatnot. I wasn’t being sketchy. I was happy and I didn’t want technology to interfere with that, yet again. Important people all knew who I was dating. Why do I need to share it with 2k people on social media that I don’t know extremely well? I’m happy, I don’t need to justify that to anyone. No offense to anyone who constantly posts about their significant other – just not my vibe.
Dating apps.
Or hook up apps, I should say. Bumble, Tinder, I don’t even know what else is out there. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had both. It’s been an interesting experience to say the least. I’ve met some cool guys. But, it’s purely entertainment most of the time. I’m not saying its impossible to find someone on there. But, it is extremely difficult. And it complicates dating because people are so accessible. If you are in a relationship and become unhappy, it’s so easy to find another person because of the apps. It’s a little scary. I fear that a lot of my generation has forgotten what it’s like to really experience a committed relationship.
We don’t Know
We really suck at being honest about what we want. If we want something serious, we fear to say that because frankly that scares half of the population off. People can’t really express what they want, so instead they give a half way answer that is something like “I’m looking for something that could maybe eventually turn serious, you know, if like dinosaurs come back from extinction or something. Wanna come over and watch Netflix?” NEVER BE AFRAID TO SAY WHAT YOU WANT, IF IT SCARES SOMEONE THEN THEY AREN’T IN THE SAME PLACE AS YOU.
How about “Ghosting”? Everything seems to be going great, and all of a sudden someone disappears. In my experience, those people always resurface. And quite frankly, they’re usually assholes and need to stay in their little ghost town. Don’t waste your time on anyone like that. Why did we start being too cowardly to tell someone we are no longer interested in them? Don’t get me wrong, I’ve ghosted someone before, but I wasn’t intentionally trying to hurt them. I was a coward and being an asshole. If I ever ghosted you, I’m sorry to you too.
We share articles all the time about what we want. But, do we really know what we want? Or do we fantasize about someone made up by some 20-something blogger on Elite Daily inspired by cheesy rom-coms? It’s so easy to get caught up in those articles and think, “man, I want someone like that in my life”. But, the truth is: you’re going to find the right person and they’re going to still do shit that annoys you. Maybe they do all of the sweet things you want, but make obnoxious noises when they eat. I’m learning as I get older, you simply just have to pick your battles.
My dude is out there somewhere, I see you boo. Get ready for your weird girl, Hannah. Life with me will be good.
Blonde.ISH. 